Date: 2006-08-24 20:49 Subject: under the pale moonlight Security: Public Mood: contemplative

... just let me hold you<3
I miss a lot of things. I just can't bring it back. I can't possibly come back. though i know that if I go back I would fall again. It scares the hell out of me. I don't want anyone else. I think that's the problem. THEY CAN NEVER BE YOU.



school has been a killer. I think being a third year student is finally sinking in. projects, ut's, quizzes and the freaking npf! haha!
someone gave us a talk and she said that STRESS IS A CHOICE, IT IS A MATTER OF HOW YOU PERCEIVE THINGS. I totally agree with her. I guess whenever I'm so preoccupied with school I tend to miss out on the beautiful things that are right in front of me. I miss second year life. We had so much fun and we were relaxed. I love Joey, Fidge, Tin, Che, Bea, Tets, Marts, Sabs, Michi, Pat and Rehi. You guys are the best!
you guys keep me sane... I love you!

Date: 2006-08-31 20:38 Subject: monthsary Security: Public Mood: crazy

it's our monthsary! i love monthsaries! haha! Joey, Fidge, Tin, Michi, Bea, Sabel, Tets, Che, Rehi, Pat and we miss you marts!
I love you guys to death! I love eating and the fact that I'm eating with my loves... yihee haha! You guys are the best!
PE was fun but after PE was way better! It was so funny! She;s hilarious! Therese's quotes are killers! I was a bit bitter... the quotes were really sad,,, 

maybe they're right... maybe I still feel something. It's not like it can change the situation. I don't really know if I want it to. How hard can it get? why do some have an easier time? why is it so hard for me? maybe because I'm just not ready... or not.

been running from this feelings for so long, telling my heart I didn't need you. PRETENDING I was better off alone but i know that it's just a LIE. so AFRAID to take a chance AGAIN. so afraid of what I FEEL inside but I NEED ro be NEXT TO YOU...

Date: 2006-09-13 21:05 Subject: breaking down... vanilla ice cream Security: Public Mood: nervous Music: dark blue by jack's mannequin

I guess some there are just some things that you can't control...
it just sucks when I realize that I could have done better... damn...
I can't fail... 
I hate it when I just breakdown. I felt so weak and loved as well. Thank you guys for comforting me. You guys are the best!

Tiniee, Geri-boo, Steffi_doglover, Katee bitter, Vica-babes WE LOVE VANILLA ICE CREAM! Killfuckmary! I guess we already know each other too well to know who were going to choose...

anyway, it's my retreat on the 20th hope that it'll be fun! I can't wait! I love my class!

"I'm not pushing you away I'm holding on for dear life but I need you to need me back..."

I love Brooke! can't wait for season 4... 
"I gave you my heart and that's all I can give you and if that's not enough for you... then I'm not enough for you"nathan and haley are so cute! oh how I wish... haha! 

Date: 2006-09-23 11:03 Subject: 23 Security: Public

23
                          it's been a year. i didn't think that it would come and you won't be here with me anymore. IT SUCKS. IT HURTS. I don't know how bad it's gonna get but I can. haha. I miss you but too bad. You already MOVED ON. I long for you. I just wish you knew how much I love you. I know it was my fault. You're leaving cause  i didn't ask you to stay.